OOC diversion time.
I cannot even begin to explain how much this attitude pisses me off, but I’m going to try.
Yes, there’s a certain message in this: if someone is always dismissing you and ignoring you, they’re not worth your time. That’s very true. But more often than not, I see things like this thrown about as a manipulation tactic to guilt friends and loved ones for daring to be busy.
And that’s just shitty.
People have problems. People have shit to deal with. People have lives, obligations, illnesses, families, a million other things they cannot walk away from. The consequences of doing so may be more than they can deal with; the stress of whatever’s going on to make them so busy may be overwhelming them.
What that means is that sometimes they cannot make time for you no matter how much they want to. It’s not physically possible. Trying to is only adding enough stress to push them over the edge. And messages like this are just a passive-aggressive way of saying “I want you to prove to me that you care about me, or I’m going to doubt your friendship/love/whatever bond we have and make you feel guilty for it.” It’s often a form of punishment used in controlling/manipulative relationships. And it’s sick.
If you really care about someone, you won’t expect them to prove their loyalty to you in return.
And if you really care, you’ll be there when they’re done with whatever is on their plate and can breathe again, and come back to you without having to drag the burden of their baggage with them.
So If you really care about them?
Stop making their lives about you and your needs.
Understand that sometimes people are busy, and that’s not a personal insult to you.
ive always hated kids
"did you hate yourself when you were a kid"